I never saw myself as having an irrational fear of homosexuals. I have repeatedly advocated for equal rights, here and elsewhere. I'm a liberal libertarian with regards to people's personal lives and lifestyles. I'm a fairly tolerant person who believes in minding my own business. Whenever I encounter religious fundamentalists who express their loathing of gays, I try to talk them out of it. Yet there are certain things that make me ask this question about myself.
Back in high school, I had a fairly progressive education. My best friend at the time was Muslim, and he was more liberal on this issue than I was. When the issue of gays came up, he said he would prefer that they didn't hide (or have to hide) who they are, as he prefers people be true to themselves. I said that I don't like people who flaunt it. Now, I could say I didn't know any better at the time, but the fact that I would have said something like that makes me wonder how much intolerance there was in my system.
When I was following the Gay Rights thread around here, someone (I can't seem to find that particular post now) posted a list showing the various stages from intolerance to full-on acceptance of homosexuals. I noticed I fell somewhere in the middle. I don't see people as sexual orientations, and I don't identify them by their sexual orientations. I see them as human beings. I believe one's orientation is but a small fraction of one's overall identity. I also believe that the way nature made you is purely random chance, and should never be a source of pride or shame.
However, I must add this caveat. I've never been on that end of a civil rights struggle, therefore I don't know what it's like. While people like myself might not believe in identifying others as gay vs. straight, that doesn't mean the rest of society has caught up. I realize that sexual orientation can therefore become a source of identity and pride. Again, this is not a perspective I'm privy to.
Now I feel I need to add something personal. I don't know if this is at all possible, but at my age I'm still unsure of my own sexual orientation. I always simply assumed I was straight. However, numerous psychological issues have gotten in the way of my forming any meaningful relationships, and I have absolutely no desire to in the first place. I can identify attractive women (and men) but I don't feel attracted to them. I never dated in high school. In fact, that was around the time I resolved to never raise a family of my own, given that my own home life was so messed up. I have discussed this issue with my therapist, and haven't come to any conclusions about it. I have few friends, a lot of trouble even making friends, and have never come close to intimacy. I fail to see the point. Perhaps there is too much coldness, distrust, and hatred in my heart.
I can look back 10 years or 20 years and see how much society has progressed. Acceptance of homosexuals is becoming the norm. Gay marriage bans are falling left and right in the USA. It probably won't be long before it's legal across the country.
So what's wrong with me?
Back in high school, I had a fairly progressive education. My best friend at the time was Muslim, and he was more liberal on this issue than I was. When the issue of gays came up, he said he would prefer that they didn't hide (or have to hide) who they are, as he prefers people be true to themselves. I said that I don't like people who flaunt it. Now, I could say I didn't know any better at the time, but the fact that I would have said something like that makes me wonder how much intolerance there was in my system.
When I was following the Gay Rights thread around here, someone (I can't seem to find that particular post now) posted a list showing the various stages from intolerance to full-on acceptance of homosexuals. I noticed I fell somewhere in the middle. I don't see people as sexual orientations, and I don't identify them by their sexual orientations. I see them as human beings. I believe one's orientation is but a small fraction of one's overall identity. I also believe that the way nature made you is purely random chance, and should never be a source of pride or shame.
However, I must add this caveat. I've never been on that end of a civil rights struggle, therefore I don't know what it's like. While people like myself might not believe in identifying others as gay vs. straight, that doesn't mean the rest of society has caught up. I realize that sexual orientation can therefore become a source of identity and pride. Again, this is not a perspective I'm privy to.
Now I feel I need to add something personal. I don't know if this is at all possible, but at my age I'm still unsure of my own sexual orientation. I always simply assumed I was straight. However, numerous psychological issues have gotten in the way of my forming any meaningful relationships, and I have absolutely no desire to in the first place. I can identify attractive women (and men) but I don't feel attracted to them. I never dated in high school. In fact, that was around the time I resolved to never raise a family of my own, given that my own home life was so messed up. I have discussed this issue with my therapist, and haven't come to any conclusions about it. I have few friends, a lot of trouble even making friends, and have never come close to intimacy. I fail to see the point. Perhaps there is too much coldness, distrust, and hatred in my heart.
I can look back 10 years or 20 years and see how much society has progressed. Acceptance of homosexuals is becoming the norm. Gay marriage bans are falling left and right in the USA. It probably won't be long before it's legal across the country.
So what's wrong with me?
via JREF Forum http://ift.tt/1yJMfpH
Aucun commentaire:
Enregistrer un commentaire