You’ve seen it on Snapchat. Facebook. Instagram.
“I used to weigh 685 pounds. I hated myself. I was bullied. Life was very hard. Now I’m a millionaire life coach and I’ve completely turned my life around.”
Usually this includes one grainy photo of them when they were overweight and another of them today — shirtless, on the beach, smiling, with a beautiful spouse at their side.
At first glance this seems vulnerable. They’re peeling back the facade that they’ve always had their life together and showing a time when they weren’t so “perfect.” It seems to humanize them, make them relatable.
But think about what they’re actually doing.
They’re not vulnerable at all. They’re a success story — a complete, ends-tied narrative of failure to fame. They aren’t risking anything by showing you how they overcame their obstacles. What are you gonna say, “Wow, you used to be fat LOL”? That’ll roll right off their back because been there, done that. They already overcame that hurdle.
I’m not saying that overcoming obstacles means that you are never vulnerable when talking about them. I mean that 90% of the people who claim to be “vulnerable” online… aren’t.
Is admitting that they lost weight or made millions of dollars or had a total glow-up really going to stop these people from being successful? No. Their faux-nerability is, if anything, going to get them more money, more clients, more followers. If you have nothing to lose, are you really vulnerable?
I don’t think so.
Actual vulnerability requires an actual risk — the exposure of real weaknesses and flaws. It’s not vulnerable if sharing it can’t hurt you.
I hate it because there are so many truly emotional, vulnerable stories out there that people are sharing. So many people are actually opening up their hearts and exposing themselves to risks, and by no means should they be put in the same category as faux-nerable writers. It’s not the same thing.
There’s nothing wrong with telling stories that aren’t vulnerable. Every story serves its own purpose.
But then let’s not pretend that faux-nerable writers are really taking a risk by sharing theirs.
“I used to weigh 685 pounds. I hated myself. I was bullied. Life was very hard. Now I’m a millionaire life coach and I’ve completely turned my life around.”
Usually this includes one grainy photo of them when they were overweight and another of them today — shirtless, on the beach, smiling, with a beautiful spouse at their side.
At first glance this seems vulnerable. They’re peeling back the facade that they’ve always had their life together and showing a time when they weren’t so “perfect.” It seems to humanize them, make them relatable.
But think about what they’re actually doing.
They’re not vulnerable at all. They’re a success story — a complete, ends-tied narrative of failure to fame. They aren’t risking anything by showing you how they overcame their obstacles. What are you gonna say, “Wow, you used to be fat LOL”? That’ll roll right off their back because been there, done that. They already overcame that hurdle.
I’m not saying that overcoming obstacles means that you are never vulnerable when talking about them. I mean that 90% of the people who claim to be “vulnerable” online… aren’t.
Is admitting that they lost weight or made millions of dollars or had a total glow-up really going to stop these people from being successful? No. Their faux-nerability is, if anything, going to get them more money, more clients, more followers. If you have nothing to lose, are you really vulnerable?
I don’t think so.
Actual vulnerability requires an actual risk — the exposure of real weaknesses and flaws. It’s not vulnerable if sharing it can’t hurt you.
I hate it because there are so many truly emotional, vulnerable stories out there that people are sharing. So many people are actually opening up their hearts and exposing themselves to risks, and by no means should they be put in the same category as faux-nerable writers. It’s not the same thing.
There’s nothing wrong with telling stories that aren’t vulnerable. Every story serves its own purpose.
But then let’s not pretend that faux-nerable writers are really taking a risk by sharing theirs.
via International Skeptics Forum https://ift.tt/31OZx8D
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